March 26, 2011

I don't know how long this post will be...I have both the girls sitting next to me, and I am pretty sure that at any minute Audrey is going to drag me to the kitchen to get her something to eat.  I'm holding off giving them lunch because we're going to be leaving for my nephew Collin's birthday party in about an hour.  There will be tons to eat there, and it's a way to keep them occupied...at least for a little while. 

I can't belive that Collin is already turning one.  It doesn't seem like it's been that long.  It makes me a little sad that I don't know him very well, and he doesn't know me at all.  I know that I should just suck it up and go over there more often, even if I'm not the biggest fan of his mom.   That's not his fault.  But, man, she makes it hard to like her sometimes.  I've tried.  Honest.  But she has gotten so used to being by herself that I think she's forgotten social rules and how to interact with other people.  I get it, I kind of had that happen the last year I was in Rochester...but I had friends that I hung out with and talked to and stuff.  I didn't just shut myself off from everyone.  Whatever.

Isabel with my brother, Michael

Isabel with her cousin, Collin, the birthday boy...Audrey did not want her picture taken.

So, things are good.  I'm not sure about Audrey's new school, but hopefully they'll get it together and I won't have to go in and yell at them (again).  The biggest issue is that her bus hasn't been arranged yet, so I have to pick her up and drop her off every day.  It's really annoying.  Especially now that the car needs a front-end alignment.  I drove up on a curb on my birthday (completely sober) and blew the tire and bent something.  Driving it makes me nervous now.

Sorry this is so short, but I have to go give both the girls baths and make them presentable.  Even though I know my mom is going to be late getting here. :)

March 19, 2011

Driving.  That is how I spent this Saturday.  Driving and driving and driving.  I was at my sister's (Dianne) and started feeling sick early on Friday.  Most of Friday night was me feeling like I was delirious and freezing.  Luckily by morning the fever had broken, so I could leave.  I had to meet Jon in Kokomo at 9am to get the girls.  Dianne came with me so she could see them.  Caleb (her husband) met us in Carmel so that I didn't have to drive her all the way back to Fishers.

Caleb and I on St. Patty's day

Dianne and Caleb

Anyway, back to my week in Indiana...I spent most of it in Rochester.  I stayed at Amanda's house, which was cool.  She and her family weren't home much.  They had a funeral and viewing to go to right after I got there, so I was by myself most of the time.  During the day, I watched Audrey and Isabel, because Jon didn't have anyone to watch Audrey (don't get me started).  It was good to get to spend time with them, Isabel especially, since I hadn't seen her in so long.

Molly and Quinn

Amanda V and Quinn

Me (exhausted) and Miss Molly

The pictures Molly and I colored...I even got a sticker! Yay, me!

Saturday (the day I got to Rochester) I went out with Erica and Amanda.  Erica's boyfriend was there, too.  We went to this tiny bar in Mentone...it was actually fun, though. We ran into two of the three people I knew that went to Valley.  One of them I used to call Minkus after that guy on "Boy Meets World."  Not nice, I know, but it's not like he still looks like that...though he is still a tool.  I apparently took a ton of random pictures that night.  I'm not sure why I said "apparently,"  like I haven't seen the pictures on my camera...and the time stamps...and seen that they are, indeed, some of the most random pictures ever.  Some are pretty funny, though.  Mostly they're fuzzy and out-of-focus...it's like my camera was drunk, too! hahaha!

Jon and Erica

Amanda D and me

Me and Erica

Erica and Jon with the guy I called Minkus

What else, what else?  I'm SOOOO  happy to be home.  I missed Pete like crazy.  In a way (and I tried to explain this to him)  I'm glad that we had this time apart.  It reaffirmed what I already knew:  that he is totally and completely the man for me.  I had a tiny part of me that worried that this was proximal...you know, we're together all the time, I don't have any other friends, so of course I would think that we were totally in love and get more serious than everyone thinks I should.  But being away from him, those feelings weren't diminished.  If anything, I talked about him all the time (not just when I was drunk) and called him, texted him, and thought about him constantly.  Oh, and we did FB chat.  But, yeah, to me, it showed that it's not just a case of us being around each other.  I've had those kind of relationships or friendships...once someone moves or it's not convenient anymore, the relationship/friendship suffers.  For us, it's strengthened it.  Sure, this may be the "honeymoon" phase, but we're closing in on 8 months...getting an eight month honeymoon sounds pretty amazing to me :)

March 12, 2011

Saturday I was in a post-drive fog.  I somehow managed to stay awake and somewhat function, but the whole day is a bit of a blur.  That is probably because I got to Rochester around 10 am, and had been driving since 2:30 pm the previous day...and had gotten up on Friday at 7-ish.  I still don't feel completely together, but it's better.

The drive wasn't too bad.  My mom talked to me on the phone quite a bit, which helped because for a while I was hallucinating and seeing mysterious shapes on the highway.  Never a good sign.  But I made it, and got to see Isabel!

She is so grown-up compared to how she was when she left in December.  So many little (and big) changes...it's strange.  At first I barely recognized the (much) taller and articulate little girl talking to me...but then she started laughing...if you've ever seen Isabel laugh, you'd recognize her anywhere.  She just grins and all of her teeth show...hilarious!

Giggly girl on her 3rd birthday

According to Susan (Jon's mom) Audrey has been having a really rough time.  Hmmm...funny, because although she doesn't sleep through the night, behavior-wise she's never been better.  I don't know what's going on over there, but I think it's not so much that she's having a rough time and it's more that THEY'RE having to actually take care of her.  A slight, but important, difference.

Whatever.  Jon wanted to see her and spend time with her.  He's had months to figure out who was going to watch her this week...guess he forgot to tell me that I was going to be the one watching her.  Normally, I wouldn't care, but I actually have plans on Thursday night with my sister in Fishers.  So, I told him if he wants to bring the girls to Kokomo (about halfway) on Friday, I would watch them...but I haven't heard from him, so who know what is going on.

I just know that it's been great to get to see my friends, it's been great to have Isabel back, and it's going to be great to see my sister in a couple days.  The best will be going home, though.  As weird as it may seem, Rochester doesn't seem like home anymore.  I lived here for almost 18 years...but aside from my friends, I don't feel connected.  Home is where I'm happy and where I belong.  Home is where there is love and peace.  Home is truely where the heart is.  Home is with my girls and Pete.

March 5, 2011

Let's just pretend that I actually remembered to post this on Saturday...I did think on Saturday, "oh yeah, I need to go do my blog..." but then got busy and forgot.  Oops.  Lots going on, though, so I think that I should be given a break.  And now that we have the internet at the apartment, I'll be able to actually do it on Saturdays, since I won't have to head to my mom's and steal her internet access.

Still unpacking (that's what I should be doing now, actually) and getting stuff organized at the new place.  It's coming along, though.  Furniture will make a big difference.  At least Audrey and Isabel (when she gets back) have beds to sleep on.  Hopefully while I'm in Indiana Pete will get us one, too.  Not that sleeping on the floor isn't super-fun...wait, no, it sucks.  But he had to spend so much money from his last check getting things like food and dishes that we couldn't get a mattress yet.  Soon.

I never realized how much stuff I have, either.  Most of it is in boxes because it's things like journals (which are really intersting to re-read) and things I've saved from high school, college, and the last 10 years.  Lots of books.  The clothing needs to be sorted, but I think for now Pete would just be happy to have it off the floor and hung up in a closet...any closet. :)  I'll try to make that happen before I go get Audrey from my mom's.

That's been really annoying.  This past 2 weeks (since we've moved to Dallas) Audrey's still been at her school in Plano.  They have Spring Break starting on Friday, so we figured she would go to her old school until then, then switch to her new one.  However, that means that she's been sleeping at my mom's apartment to catch the bus in the morning at 7am, then I have to be over there by 2:30 pm to meet her bus and hang out until my mom gets home at 5:30.  It's not too bad, but it really cuts the day in half.  Then I leave from her place and go get Pete from work.  Repeat.

I'm still waiting to hear from some jobs and stuff.  Hopefully I'll get SOMETHING.  This whole being-broke thing sucks.  Big time.  I hate not having money of my own.  Soon, though, I should have some sort of job.  If Macy's would just give me more freaking hours I would stay with them, but whatever.

What else, what else?  So, I'm leaving for Indiana on Friday afternoon...so not looking forward to the drive.  Audrey's pretty good in the car, so I'm not worried about that, but the trip back with both of them should be interesting, to say the least.  I can't wait to see Isabel, though.  Three months is just too long!  Her birthday is Sunday, and I can hardly believe that she's going to be 3 years old already.  Time flies, huh?  It's going to be good to have her home.  I know that she was driving me crazy before, but I think that was largely due to the incredible stress I was under because of the divorce and living with my mom.  Now both of those things have been taken care of, and I have to say, I feel pretty damn good.  Despite sleeping on the floor and being broke. hahaha! 

I'm excited to see my friends, too.  I talk to Amanda pretty regularly, and I'll be staying at her place while I'm in Rochester.  She's been really good about calling and stuff a couple times a week.  I text with Kristin every so often, but that's how it's always been with us.  I get to go to Ellie's birthday party on Sunday (and Jon said I can bring the girls), so that will be fun.  I haven't gotten to see them since Christmas.  Amanda D and I have plans for lunch at some point while I'm up there, and  I want to see Carol (Jon's sister), too.  I wanted to see her when I was there last time, but was worried that it would be too weird.  Erika is down in Anderson now, and I haven't heard from her in a while.  I don't know if I'll see her, or what.  And Erica is living in Rochester now, so I'm sure I'll see her while I'm up there.  Then I get to go spend a couple days with my sister, who I talked to for like, a minute when I was there in December.  It should be a good trip.  I just need to remember to bring my camera AND actually take pictures!

Alright, I have 10 minutes to hurry and put some stuff away...wish me luck!